"it's complicated."

I am also one of the "couples who have talked for several years" mentioned above.

more than three years, in my opinion, it is a long time, in which I have experienced a lot of separation and reunion.

whenever a friend asks what it's like to be in a long-term relationship, my real feeling is:

it's not easy to keep going, but it's hard to stop.

the longer a relationship lasts, whether it's a habit or like it, it's like there's something that binds two people together.

We, who ate a lot of meals, watched a lot of movies and talked about our lives many times, didn't realize what had happened.

it was not until the day of breakup that I found that the two people were more "torn apart" than "separated".

seems to cut off the intimate connection between two people, accompanied by real pain.

looking down, I am still the whole self, but I seem to be missing a part forever.

so, I kind of understand that sentence "very complicated".

two people who have walked such a long way are willing to catch all the pain that falls on them and insist on the reason to part.

I think, or I prefer to believe, that it is not a simple sentence that can be summed up by dislike, boredom, and tiredness.

besides, the second time I smelled the complexity of feelings was when I came home for the Spring Festival.

I met an old classmate who had a good relationship. When talking about her relationship, she said:

"now, if you want to get married, you also want to break up."

to be honest, I didn't think these two ideas could exist at the same time.

but the wonderful thing is that, almost instantly, she and I looked at each other and smiled.

I don't know if I saw too many people go through this delicate emotional stage, so I understood the contradictions in her words at that moment.

on the one hand, we are really working hard to build a common future, and on the other hand, we can't help asking:

is he good enough? Is your self good enough at this stage? Are you sure you want that kind of life?

in fact, I don't know if these questions are good, whether they are worth asking, and whether they look "not very smart".

but we, ah, are usually just people who hesitate about what flavor of ice cream to buy and which movie to watch during the Spring Festival.

Let's decide now whether to marry and who to marry. How can we have a definite answer right away?

so we will be contradictory, tangled, hesitant, and feel that we can do whatever we want for a moment, but we don't think we can do anything at all.

maybe this is the meaning of what Luo Zhenyu said:

growth may be nothing but good or bad. Because the essence of growth is not to improve, not to improve.

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so I tried to add the second half of Luo Zhenyu's sentence as I thought: